Ask God the Hard Questions


Have you ever been afraid to ask God the questions in your heart? Do you feel guilty for questioning some things (or everything) you’ve ever believed about God? Is there shame covering you because doubts are flooding your mind?

In my experience, the conservative Christian church has been afraid of allowing people to ask questions. This has left an entire generation of people who have either left the church or are hanging on confused and not truly knowing what they believe.

Learning in depth about other beliefs or understanding different religions was hinted at, but never fully taught. Apologetics in some arenas was rightly a focus, but unfortunately, you were only taught the facts you needed to prove your own point or to have a punchy rebuttal. Truly understanding another religion or denomination’s opinions and beliefs was frowned upon because…you might begin to think they’re right.

I Peter 3:15 was the reason we had to have our “one-liners” memorized and ready to “give the Gospel” or shut down anyone else with a differing belief.

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear
— 1 Peter 3:15, KJV

I had been prepped with quippy arguments to prove that my faith in Christ was the one and only way. But when the real world slapped me in the face, those snippets didn’t stand the test. Often I tell people, “I learned more from the world about being a Christian than I ever did in the church.”

God is not afraid of your questions. You cannot change His truth. Your questions, fears, doubts - they will not alter Him or His plan for your life.

While on staff at a church, I had a mother come to me in tears because her teenage son had decided he didn’t want to attend church any more and in fact, he wasn’t sure he believed in God either. I asked about his behavior - the way he was at home and treated her. She went on to say how he was an obedient, respectful son who followed house rules and curfew and was helpful at home.

What I said next completely surprised her, “It’s ok for him to ask questions. Don’t pressure him to attend church with you.”

Next, I encouraged her to keep conversation flowing with her son. Let him ask questions and together search for the answers. Don’t tell him what to believe, instead walk with him on his quest for finding truth. Make sure he knows that he is loved no matter what he chooses to believe.

If you too are full of questions, I urge you:

  • Seek for TRUTH.

  • Don’t have an answer already in your mind.

  • Be willing to radically change your views.

  • Be willing to maintain a belief you already posses.

  • It’s ok, for a season, to not know what you believe.

  • Be cautious of the pendulum swing.

  • Don’t rush the process.

My deconstruction took me all the way back to, “Is there a God?” - a question as old as mankind. I had to work out the answer for myself and with myself. In the end, I chose the belief that there is a God. But that was my decision. It was no longer compulsory. I chose to leave indoctrination behind and embrace the truth I had found because of my experiences, research and yes, faith.

You have permission to ask questions. You have permission to believe something that isn’t exactly what you were taught growing up. You have permission to make your experience with God…yours. God’s love isn’t limited to a denomination or organization. His love isn’t only available to you IF you believe a certain way. Ask God the hard questions.


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