Signs of Spiritual Abuse in Children and Families

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Signs of Spiritual Abuse in Children and Families

Spiritual abuse has long been veiled as Christian parenting. People just buy into the system hook, line and sinker. While it’s true spiritual abuse can have some physical features, it’s generally more subtle. Spiritual abuse first affects a person’s mind, moves into their core beliefs, and then informs their actions. Spiritual abuse intersects with psychological and emotional abuse in this way because spiritual abuse impacts mind, body and soul.

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What’s the Deal with Faith Deconstruction?

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What’s the Deal with Faith Deconstruction?

If you are currently in a church, Christian family or religious community, chances are you’ve heard the word “deconstruction.” The term may have been presented in a negative light to you or perhaps you don’t truly know what it means. Or, if you’ve been on social media in the last few months and follow any prominent Christian leaders, your introduction to the word may have been through a heated video clip and thread. One thing is for certain, the term “deconstruction” and all it entails is a word stirring up much controversy in American religious spaces right now.

Why are people reacting so strongly to this word and the subsequent “deconstruction culture?” It’s complicated. In this post, I will do my best to help you understand why people are reactive to deconstruction, what deconstruction really is and how you can help. Are you ready for lots of information?

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Are You a Recovering Fundamentalist?

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Are You a Recovering Fundamentalist?

Over ten years ago, my husband and I met with a couple for marriage counseling. We were struggling, really struggling. About halfway through our time together, the husband looked me squarely in the eyes and said, “You’re a legalist. Once a legalist, always a legalist.” This offended me greatly as I had been working so hard to overcome my fundamentalist roots and we were here to talk mostly about my own husband’s failings anyway.

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8 Tips to Deconstructing Your Faith Without Losing Your Marriage

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8 Tips to Deconstructing Your Faith Without Losing Your Marriage

When you’re married or in a committed relationship, one of the hardest parts about experiencing faith deconstruction or a Spiritual Identity Disruption TM, is the toll it takes on that valuable relationship. Realizing you had been handed a toxic, controlling or abusive version of faith is hard enough, but what comes next as you process everything can retraumatize, devastate and potentially shatter and already fractured sense of self.

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Spiritual Identity Disruption

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Spiritual Identity Disruption

Spiritual Identity Disruption is when what you believed or were taught about faith or spirituality collide with an opposing lived experience - which may include abuse, trauma and hypocrisy.

This polarization cannot be reconciled using the existing foundation thus causing a disruption of identity and crisis of belief.

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Growing Up Fundy: An analysis of being raised in Christian fundamentalism.

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Growing Up Fundy: An analysis of being raised in Christian fundamentalism.

Evangelical fundamentalism was founded to counter-act the women’s rights movements, especially women working outside the home, and modern theory in a post-World War I world. The movement was at it’s peak during the 1950-1980’s. Sub-denominations were even formed during this time, claiming further truth and belief in Biblical fundamentals – such as the denomination of my childhood, Independent Fundamental Baptist.

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Parenting: It can be different. You know better.

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Parenting: It can be different. You know better.

As someone who is living a life differently than how they were raised, someone who has fought hard to find truth and battled through the agony of deconstruction – little things can become big things when you least expect it.

As you may know, I am a homeschool mom. This often feels like a love/hate situation because you see, I was homeschooled. Triggers, known pitfalls, lack of actual schooling, strained family relationships – I want to avoid those things. I have seen far too much of that

There, however, is much good that comes from home educating your children too – unlimited family adventures, an individualized education, learning new things together, freedom to explore personal learning styles and interests, studying about then traveling the world - I am embracing those amazing things.

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